Blog 365

Confessions at 9:58pm

I can’t swim very well.

I don’t drink alcohol.

I also don’t drink coffee. Or soda.

I drink lots of water. And milk. And chai with white sugar & milk.

I sing along loudly to Tarzan on long road trips by myself.

It takes me a long time to make up my mind.

I love learning how creative people make their art.

I only like black RSVP pens for every-day writing.

I am sometimes terrified of boys.

I’ve never been kissed.

I’m afraid I’m too idealistic.

I don’t really like Greek mythology.

I am very comfortable spending time with myself.

I despise bad odors, and I love beautiful smells.

I watch TV shows on Netflix, but I never watch TV.

I get exhausted by the heat.

I have incredibly sensitive eyes made worse by terrible seasonal allergies.

One of my biggest fears is fire.

One of my other biggest fears is getting in a horrible car accident on the freeway.

I love the smell of rain.

In fact, I love the Northwest more than any other place on earth.

I always wanted to do ballet or gymnastics when I was little.

I’ve never been bullied, but I’ve known what it’s like to feel like I have no friends.

I also feel like I have some of the best friends in the world right now.

Sometimes the right picture or the right string of words will leave me breathless.

My dreams are too vivid sometimes. Both the daytime and the nighttime kind.

I’m afraid of failing. All. the. time.

I’m okay with everything on this list.

Because I’ve lived through some terribly insecure times in my life, and God has
revealed His tender mercy and grace to me in those times –
Rescuing me from feeling like my identity is tied up in others’ perceptions of me.

I don’t always follow the crowd. I don’t always share the most popular opinion.
And I would rather be me unashamedly and content with who God has made me to be
Than to constantly bend to the whims of others and be untrue to my soul of souls.

Sometimes you even discover someone who has the same threads in their souls
That you have in your own.

And you’re covered in warmth at knowing there’s another person just like you
In one small way.

Maybe that’s you reading this post right now.

If so, just know I wish I could hug you & smile into your eyes and say,
“Welcome, friend. Our souls can be at home together.”

There’s peace in being transparent. Because secrets are terribly choking things
And insecurities are what will wear you down day after day.

There’s joy in letting our veils down and creating a space of openness.
You and me – maybe we could start that right here, right now, today.

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