I have come to discover that there are only two things that are important in a future spouse. A relationship with Christ as described below is the first. The second will be described in the next blog post.
This was originally written on December 31, 2017, after hearing a message about Jonathan Edwards and his 70 Resolutions at age 17. You can either choose to be embarrassed about having high standards or inspire others to raise theirs. Jonathan Edwards inspired me to raise mine.
Resolved: never to marry unless it is to a man who is captivated by one purpose – to pursue with passion the glory of God in all areas of life.
Resolved: never to marry unless it is to a man whose life is an ardent flame, burning insistently to spread the fragrance of Christ everywhere.
Resolved: never to marry unless it is to a man who lives with goals, intentions, and discipline to do what it is that God has called him to do.
Resolved: never to marry unless it is to a godly, humble leader who is submitted to God’s will for his life and eagerly lives each day pursuing it.
Resolved: never to marry unless it is to a man who thinks deeply and crafts each decision in life purposefully and wisely.
Resolved: never to marry unless it is to a man who knows the frailty of his own soul, and daily seeks to kill his sin by the power of the Holy Spirit, repenting and seeking to walk in truth.
Resolved: never to toy around with any man whom I know does not possess these qualities, by which I would be revealing my lack of commitment to them.
Resolved: to learn patience and contentment in Christ if He deems it better to not bring me such a man, trusting that He has purposes He wants me to accomplish alone.
Resolved: to view and speak/write of marriage rightly – namely as a blessing and opportunity to serve the Lord with someone He has designed to be my earthly delight and partner – but not as more important and greater than the blessing and opportunity to serve Christ singly with my unique gifts and passions.
Resolved: to strive with daily passion to become this very person so that if such a man ever did come into my life, I would be worthy of his love and pursuit.
2 thoughts on “Resolved, Never to Marry”
I have been reading your blog for a long time, and also loved who I got to know when I was originally in my undergrad. I hope you know that your standards helped to raise mine when I was not married, and gave me the freedom to be satisfied with my intimate relationship with Christ. This in turn gave me patience to not pursue men anymore, which gave my now husband the opportunity to hear God calling him to pursue me. Even now being married and reading this, I am reminded to be resolved in knowing that now that I have been given a partner to serve alongside, that I must still hold myself to these standards as a wife, and acknowledge my husband as he is living to what God has called him to be. Thank you for this. Have a blessed day.
Jenni, thank you for sharing this with me! I’m thankful to know that I was able to encourage you both then and now, and I pray that God continues to build you and your husband up in your marriage all the time.