By this point, I have written enough posts about the difficulties of being single and doing life on my own that you readers know how intimately acquainted I am with it.
And yet, this is not a full picture of what regular life is like for me as a single woman. Even in the loneliness, there are many moments of joy in the solitude that others will never know about. And I recently discovered an artist who perfectly captures this.
I think it was almost a year ago when I discovered Yaoyao Ma Van As’s artwork on a Facebook post or blog somewhere. And once I found her illustrations, I couldn’t stop going back to them. It was like I had found someone who had held a mirror up to sweet little moments in my everyday life that I thought no one else saw or understood.
And they truly are the best parts of living alone. These are the moments where I enjoy my own company – where the solitude is a friend to my dreams, my thoughts and imaginations, and my soaking in the beauty of the moment.
How does she so perfectly capture what I’m feeling and thinking in these pictures?
Moments like this where I’ve sat in the gathering twilight or growing moonlight as poetry tumbles through my mind, trying to capture all the beauty around me.
Or moments like this where I experience pure joy in some activity or unexpected gift of delight.
Or these moments (which have happened quite a bit in the past few days) where I simply soak in the rain outside my window or the crisp autumn air on a walk with my Daisy.
There are also the bittersweet times that she captures so well in a wave of sadness which comes in moments I don’t expect.
And there are the moments of sweet rest in reading, cups of tea, and the dog all curled up next to me.
There are more that I could speak of (and I encourage you to look through all her artwork on her website and follow her on social media), but I hope these pictures give a little glimpse into what my life is actually like.
Yes, there are tears and heartache and painful wonderings. But there are also contented moments like last night listening to the rain sing a lullaby to me as I fell asleep all cozy warm in my bed. And moments of joy as I scuffle through the leaves on an autumn walk after school. And moments of peace as I fold laundry and sing along with worship songs.
Even though I may not have a “witness to my life” as my last blog post spoke of, I do enjoy my own company and the sweet ongoing conversation I have with my Abba Father throughout all my daily habits and routines. He sees my life, and when I live it out in humble worship and joyful gratitude, it brings him honor and glory even if no one else knows.
So thank you, Yaoyao Ma Van As, for giving such beauty and personification to the joys of living alone. Thank you for helping others to see the life that is often lived in solitude, but nonetheless enjoyed and appreciated.
May this insignificant life continue to bring him all the glory.